Tag: bridesmaid

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Pink Bridezilla

If you’ve read my previous blog, “To Pink or Not to Pink,” you understand that I am not a fan of brides choosing pink for their bridesmaids. I have an example currently in my studio that is probably the most hideous example of this that I have ever seen.

I will start first by saying that the bridesmaid in question (I will call her Samantha*) was a bride of mine. Samantha’s sister is now getting married, and she has chosen this awful rose gold metallic dress with a herringbone pattern that has a knotted feature at the middle for her bridesmaids, including Samantha. The only person this would look good on is a size 2 or less. Never mind that there isn’t anyone in her lineup that is a size 2 or less. Samantha, for instance, is definitely Rubenesque in figure, and a knot in the center of a Rubenesque figure is certainly not an asset.

Samantha brought the dress to me and explained that she bought the biggest size they had. Unfortunately, this didn’t begin to fit her. The dress, in addition to having a knot in the front, had a U-shaped back with a bar across to hold the straps in place. So, not only did the zipper not go up all the way, but the bar didn’t even make it halfway across Samantha’s back.

What I ended up doing was taking the scraps I cut off the bottom of her dress (because it needed to be hemmed) as well as the scraps from another of the bridesmaid’s dresses to fill in the back for her. I got rid of the U shape, made it a V to match the front neckline, and put in a longer zipper so the dress was at least more supportive of her curvaceous figure.

Miraculously, also with the help of a pair of Spanx, the dress looked reasonable on her post alterations. It was never going to look fantastic, as the design elements didn’t go with Samantha’s figure. Samantha even confided in me that ALL of the bridesmaids hated this dress.

I understand that, from the bride’s point of view, this is HER day and she should be able to do whatever she pleases. HOWEVER . . . for the love of all your friends, sisters and other relatives who have to wear these often hideous frocks, PLEASE have a care for what these wonderful folks will look like in the photos. If you can’t make them look fabulous, at least don’t make them look hideous.

After this kerfuffle is done, I fully expect to get a video from Samantha with her and the other bridesmaids burning all these dresses in effigy in her friend’s outdoor fire pit. I also plan to drink to their fiery demise as I watch said video J

Cheers y’all! Until next time!

Heather

*Name changed to protect the innocent and to avoid pissing off the bride in question LOL

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The Ultimate Bridezilla

When most folks think of the term bridezilla, they picture the tantrum throwing, sailor swearing, hysterically sobbing whack job that you generally see on reality programs like Say Yes to the Dress (which is one of the reasons I don’t watch that show, incidentally). In my line of work, I’ve been exposed to enough of them, including Mom-zillas, but I would have to say the worst one I’ve come across was far calmer, far scarier, and more insidious than the tantrum throwing toddler in an adult body.

The appointment began like many others: I welcomed the bride and her best friend/maid of honor into my studio, talked about the dress, did the fitting, discussed options, and talked about what comes next. In many cases, the bridesmaid asks if she can bring me her dress too. The answer is always yes, as I do alterations for the entire bridal party.

At the time, I didn’t think anything of it when the bride told me that she was getting married in the Mormon Temple and her dress needed to cover her temple garments, underwear worn by followers of the Mormon faith after they have taken part in the endowment ceremony. These garments are required for any adult who previously participated in the endowment ceremony to enter a temple. They remind me of saint medals worn by the Catholics, yarmulkes worn by Jewish men, and hajibs worn by Muslim women. They are symbols of their faith. I’ve known a handful of devout Mormons in my life, and these garments are a BIG deal to them. Something else that should be mentioned is that, if you haven’t gone through the endowment ceremony, you WON’T be allowed in the temple. No exceptions. So, unlike the other three examples that I mentioned, this one is representative of exclusivity.

Okay, so the stage is set. Enter the maid of honor (MOH) on her own for a fitting appointment for her dress. When I answered the door, there she was, sans dress. Usually when this happens, something else has gone awry in the woman’s life, so I asked if she was okay. She attempted not to burst into tears . . . and failed miserably. I invited her in and scooped her into my arms for a much-needed hug (don’t worry . . . it was pre-COVID). In my line of work, I’m often called upon to play psychologist.

I sat her down, provided tissue, wine, and chocolate, and offered to listen to whatever she needed to say. Slowly, the story poured out between her tears. Apparently, the two women had been thick as thieves through high school and college even though the MOH was not a member of the Mormon Church (not that her friend hadn’t tried). They both dated another set of best friends, neither of whom were Mormons either. When they graduated from high school, the MOH and her beau went separate ways, but her friend received a proposal. The bride apparently agreed on the condition that her fiancé not only become Mormon but also go through the endowment ceremony.

At this point, I didn’t quite understand or remember what the big deal was, so I asked for clarification. She then told me that the only people who would be allowed to attend the wedding were the bride’s parents (see paragraph 3). I was aghast. I asked why they didn’t just elope instead of making a big deal out of it. The MOH continued, saying that it wasn’t the worst part. She told me that her BFF had chosen another Mormon, someone she’d just met, to stand with her for the ceremony. Now I understood the betrayal. The MOH, who had been the bride’s best friend all through high school and college, was being laid aside like an old doll in favor of someone who had the right credentials.

When I saw the bride for the final fitting, I chose to say nothing. It wasn’t my affair, and karma would take care of her in the end. I never saw the MOH again. I heard nothing back from either of them, so I don’t know what happened with the wedding or their friendship.

From my perspective, it seemed that the MOH was deeply wounded by the bride’s betrayal. It was almost as if the bride was telling the MOH, “I’m getting married now and I don’t need you.”  Don’t get me wrong.  I understand that someone’s faith can be extremely important to them.  It just seemed extremely selfish to me for the bride to treat the person who was supposed to be her best friend in that manner. And it wasn’t just her BFF.  She made crazy demands of her fiancé (as I understand it now, the endowment ceremony is quite the event for which to prepare) and unfair demands of his family and their attendants, as she expected them to help with the reception even though they would be unable to witness the union. With so many easy and loving compromises at her fingertips, it just flummoxed me why she would choose this route … one that excluded so many and damaged so many relationships.  Not a good way to start what should be a joyous transition in your life.

Until next time Dear Readers, may all your bobbins be full and all your seams be straight.

Heather

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To Pink or Not to Pink?

May I be brutally honest for a minute? I always groan inwardly when a poor bridesmaid comes to me for alterations on a pink dress. Even in the movies, where they have the best make-up artists and the best costume designers, etc., a pink dress has never looked fabulous on any bridesmaid–whether it was in 27 Dresses,Bridesmaids, or Steel Magnolias, with bride Shelby and her two shades of pink, “blush” and “bashful.” (Boy, I just dated myself. Lol!)

Please, don’t get me wrong. I do love the color pink. It just has a bigger tendency to look “muddy” against the skin since it washes out the wearer, which is probably why I have not seen anyone yet that looks good in any shade of pink that a bride has picked.  I am glad, however, that brides have followed the trend of letting their bridesmaids pick the style that best suits their figures in recent years. That at least makes wearing this required dress a bit more palatable. Still, their color shade choices sometimes leave a great deal to be desired, so about the only thing that a bridesmaid can do if she likes the style of dress is dye the dress black afterwards.

To address this, let’s talk about color theory for a minute. If you line up a random bunch of people from lightest skin shade to darkest, you will notice that the undertone of each skin color is different. Some people, like myself, have a blue undertone to their skin. These folks are classified as either “Summer” or “Winter.” In other words, they look good in colors with a very strong blue undertone. “Winters“ are the easiest to identify because they look absolutely fabulous in jewel tones. The other set of folks have a yellow undertone to their skin. These people look good in fall or warm colors; hence, their classification is either “Spring” or “Autumn.”

So, what’s a bride to do? Well…aside from hiring a color theorist to line all your bridesmaids up and figure things out, you can do one simple test. You will need two fabric swatches, one orange and one royal blue. When you hold each fabric just under the chin of your bridesmaid, you will find that one of those colors will make her skin glow. If the orange makes her glow, then she has yellow undertones in her skin, and if the blue makes her glow, then she has blue undertones in her skin. If you luck out and everybody is one type, fantastic! That makes your job of choosing a color and a shade easier. If you have a mix, like most people do, then you should consider looking at neutral shades if you want your bridesmaids to be able to wear the dress again–or, at a minimum, not to look like they’re ghost extras in a bad horror movie.

By now, you might be wondering what my favorite choices are. Most of the dresses that have come through my studio that looked good–or, at a minimum, decent–on the bridesmaids are navy, darker shades of green, red (believe it or not), burgundy, and taupe. If you still have your heart set on pink, however, please use the color guide link I’ve included below. 

Your friends love you enough to be part of your special day. Love them back by choosing a color and shade that compliments them.

Check this blog out for a very easy to understand detailed explanation as well as color samples: https://www.simplifiedwardrobe.com/blog/how-to-do-a-color-self-analysis

Until next time dear reader!

Heather